Secretariat

Secretariat is considered to be the greatest thoroughbred racehorse of all-time. His epic 31 length victory at the Belmont Stakes to win the Triple Crown still stands today as an unapproachable record, no small feat considering the medical and technological advancements used in today's horse racing. Secretariat was so much better than every other horse in his field that his greatness was all but assured. Unfortunately that's the biggest problem in making a movie about the horse's storied career. Even though we know the outcome there's still a need to create an air of mystery, or at the very least to provide a context we've never seen played out before.

The burden falls upon Diane Lane as Secretariat's tough as nails owner, Penny Chenery. Her family has been in the horse breeding business for a long time, but when her mother passes away, her father(Scott Glenn) goes into shock and is unable to care for the business.  In comes Penny to rescue what she loved so much as a child. Navigating the male-dominated world of high stakes horse racing, she uses what little she has left to rebuild her family name and put out a winner in Secretariat, an unborn fole nobody seemed to want. In order to do that she needs a world class trainer. Enter eccentric, pink plaid sportin' outsider, Lucien Luarin(John Malkovich).

While Penny spends more and more time tending to the business, at home her family is going through problems without her. Her husband(Dylan Walsh) and brother(Dylan Baker) just want her to sell the horses and be done with it. Her daughers are slowly turning into hippies and revolutionaries, and the sons have no personalities at all. An unfortunate trait. The family drama feels tacked on from the start, like a workman effort to punch up a lousy story with side journeys of characters we don't care about. We want to see the horse.

Director Randall Wallace does a nice job with the actual racing sequences. They don't call the Kentucky Derby the most exciting two minutes in sports for nothing. The anticipation at the starting gate, from the thundering of the hooves on the cold dirt track, the steely glare of the jockeys, it's all captured perfectly. I love the amplfied rhythmic roar of Secretariat's breathing as he blazes past his competiton. There should've been more time spent with the horse doing what it's known for. Those scenes have so much power and energy to them. Too much is wasted following Penny as a force for female empowerment.  It's a nice story and all, and mothers may want to bring their kids just to see how such a strong woman made a name for herself, but it's just not very compelling watching her negotiate breeding deals.

The Disney formula demands that every sports drama be as sappy, saccharine sweet as possible. That's to be expected, but even by those standards Secretariat goes way overboard. This thing is littered with lame attempts to wrangle a few Oscar votes. Every character speaks in anecdotes, and a simple horse bathing is the perfect setting for a  rousing rendition of "Oh Happy Day". 

In 2003, Seabiscuit earned a Best Picture nomination for presenting a true underdog story set in the Depression era. There were a number of colorful characters to become invested in and root for. Secretariat just has a bunch of stuffy rich people trying to stay rich. I remember the entire theater standing up and cheering at the end of Seabiscuit. Nobody did much of anything at the end of Secretariat. We were never given much of a reason to.

Secretariat is a barebones, cookie cutter sports drama that will get you excited with a sweeping musical score and grandiose finale. Unfortunately it comes up short a few lengths in just about everything else.