Review: The Joneses

Here's what is scary about The Joneses: I'm not sure it's all that far fetched. First time director Derick Borte's paints a terrifying picture of consumerism and stealth marketing taken to the extreme. It sells itself to you almost from the very first scene, showing a car that I'll likely never be able to afford in my life racing through a posh, suburban neighborhood. From the moment it parks and the Joneses emerge, all shiny and glistening like bronze idols, it's pretty obvious we're being taken for a ride. Fortunately, the bumpy ride is the best part of any con game.

The happy, smiling family in this case are led by Steve and Kate Jones(David Duchovy & Demi Moore). At first blush, they look like a typical happy American couple. Their kids, Jenn and Mick(Amber Heard & Ben Hollingsworth) should be on the cover of Tiger Beat or something. They roll into this upper class community like they own the joint. Their house is filled top to bottom with the latest furniture nobody's ever seen; they're decked out in all the most hip gear, everything from high tech TVs and golf equipment, to designer sunglasses, frozen sushi(??), and toilets that shoot water up your butt.

The Joneses blend in seamlessly wherever they go, forging their own little cliqs of mindless consumers who must have anything and everything they have. And that's the Joneses dirty little secret. They aren't there to become useful, productive pillars of the community. They're in town to sell. Not just merchandise, but to sell a lifestyle. A lifestyle of glitz, glamour, and excess. The Joneses aren't a real family at all. For Kate, this is her sixth fake marriage. A bulldog of a career woman, she runs a tight ship focused solely on making her numbers every month. Steve, however, is a former car salesman. Charming and charismatic, he's finding it difficult to exist in a phoney marriage with Kate without any of the fringe benefits. Can't really say I blame him. It would kinda suck to be "married" to Demi Moore and wind up sleeping in a twin bed alone every night.

Outside, the entire neighborhood is doing whatever it takes to be just a little bit more like the Joneses. That includes their next door neighbors, Larry and Summer(Gary Cole & Glenne Headley), a bored married couple who seem to be barely holding it together in every sense of the term. Inside, The Joneses are going through the same problems that could be ripped out of any family sitcom. Jenn is sleeping around with older men; Mick has just begun and awkward relationship with a girl not exactly ranking on the cool-o-meter; and Steve and Kate are having problems deciding who the real breadwinner in the family is. It all turns into a hilarious game of one-upmanship.

Borte does a great job throwing conventional family problems at this very unconventional "unit", as Kate calls them. When it all boils down to it, they're all just actors. Their real emotions aren't supposed to be an issue, so who can they turn to when problems arise? Not only are they not family, they don't even consider eachother to be friends. Real feelings must be totally cut out of the equation, which causes problems when Kate and Steve start getting a little too chummy.

The vast majority of the film is great fun, as the Joneses revel in their flashy toys and the envy of their neighbors. Steve is a hit at the golf course, and Kate gathers a flock of like-minded trophy wives to copy her every move. Borte, who spent a good part of his career helming commercials, knows how to perfectly integrate product placement into every single scene. I never wanted a new set of golf clubs so badly, and I've never played the sport a day in my life. There are hints of a really scathing satire on the dangers of over consumption, or the take no prisoners approach to product marketing nowadays, but thankfully the script stays light without getting too into "message mode".

At least until the end, when admittedly the film gets way too preachy and downright dark.  The storylines with the kids in particular, go down some pretty bleak paths that don't mesh well with the first part of the film. Do I really need an angle involving violence against homosexuals to be thrown in? Not really. That stuffs fine if there's time to actually explore it. The real shocker comes with the slowly developing plotline involving their neighbor Larry, which is perfectly balanced for the bulk of the film, then teeters into heavy handedness at the worst possible moment.

I love Demi Moore better now than I ever did before her hiatus from acting. She's more mature, just as gorgeous, and she seems more able to dominate any scene she's in. She's absolutely brilliant here opposite the bachelor charm of Duchovny. I wish they had spent more time with Amber Heard's character, because I found her problems trying to lead a woman's life while posing as a normal every teenager to be the most interesting.

The Joneses is one big sell game. I could call it a comedy, but it's more than that. It has a point, but thankfully the script leaves it mostly up to you to decide what that is. It's a satire, but there's just as much romantic comedy and "fish out of water" elements to it as well. Whatever you want to call it, The Joneses is fresh, hip, and downright funny. Whatever it was they were trying to peddle, consider me sold!