The 12 Days of Christmas- Day 10: 'Trading Places'

If you haven’t seen Trading Places I’m going to ask you to turn off your computer and immediately go to your nearest TV and start watching, it’s available on Netflix and Amazon Instant Video, so assuming you have one of those services (if you’re reading this site I’d say that’s a certainty) it won’t cost you a dime. Eddie Murphy and Dan Aykroyd in their prime, a young and gorgeous Jamie Lee Curtis and more classic 80s comedy moments than you can shake a stick at (where did that saying come from…like, who was shaking sticks at things in the first place? Is it a witch reference…like with a wand? Can you tell I’m somewhat ADD?). As a matter of fact, one could argue that Trading Places invented many of those 80s comedy tropes being as it came out relatively early in the decade, 1983. Today we know Eddie Murphy as the quintessential buddy comedy actor, this film gave him those roots. Sure, he had 48 Hrs. prior to this but really that movie was much more action and Nick Nolte is far from a comic counterbalance.

For the 3 of you who don’t know, Trading Places is about two guys who have their lives swapped by the old grumpy guys from The Muppet Showon a $1 bet. Ok, I made up the Muppet show bit but there’s no way that you can deny the similarities. Basically Dan Aykroyd plays Louis Winthorpee III, a spoiled yuppie and president of Duke & Duke, a stock trading firm. After literally running into homeless con man Bill Ray Valentine (Eddie Murphy) Winthorpe accuses Valentine of trying to steal his briefcase and has him arrested. Meanwhile the Duke Brothers place a $1 bet that if they make the two switch stations in life Winthorpe will turn to crime and Valentine will become a success, basically a nature vs. nurture scenario. The next thing you know the Duke’s are bailing Valentine out of jail and giving him Winthorpe’s job, home, and butler. Meanwhile they frame Winthorpe for stealing and plant drugs on him to have him arrested. In comes the prostiture with a heart of gold, Ophelia (Jamie Lee Curtis) who sees Winthorpe as a good investment opportunity and agrees to help him get back his life if she pays him back plus interest.

Where do I start? Like I stated earlier this is Aykroyd and Murphy at their best. Watching Aykroyd play this snooty pampered rich boy is nothing short of perfect. Obviously the highlight of the funny is Eddie Murphy’s Billy Ray Valentine, look no further than the prison scene for proof of that. The glue of the film is the chemistry, not just between Aykroyd and Murphy, but also the group as a whole when you mix in Jamie Lee Curtis and Denholm Elliot who plays Coleman the butler. The funniest scene of the flick, in my opinon, is when all four of them are together on a train during New Year’s Eve in disguise.  Of the movies made by that 80’s comedy crew (Aykroyd, Murphy, Chevy Chase, etc) this one sits near the top, a lot of people would put Caddyshack in front of it, but not me.

So where’s the Christmas angle? All around my dear friend, all around. The movie takes place during the holiday season and really has the benefit of being the only film on our list to tackle both Christmas and New Year’s Eve. The atmosphere of the film is drenched in yuletide trimmings, with one of the most memorable scenes having a drunk Winthorpe crashing the Duke & Duke Christmas party in a dirty Santa suit. This is another one of those films that has less to do with the sugary sweet Christmas spirit and more something to watch as a buffer between the more saccharine faire. As we talked about before with Lethal Weapon these buffer films are essential so you don’t get burned out too quickly but can still stay in the Christmas theme. 

I leave you with Billy Ray Valentine's Karate Man demonstration

Read More

Review: 'Legends of Oz: Dorothy’s Return' Starring Lea Michele, Patrick Stewart, and Martin Short

Oh the Wizard of Oz. That first story about the little Kansas girl and her dog being swept away to a magical land has surely lasted the test of time. A completely American fairy tale it’s been able to spawn so many books and adaptations. Last year we got the live action prequel Oz the Great and Powerful and this past season on TV with Once Upon A Time added the Wicked Witch of the West (don’t ask me how that works with the Disney princess stuff). I guess with this whole resurgence of interest in Oz someone decided they needed to also combine with another trend of 3D CG animated family movies and that’s how we got Legends of Oz: Dorothy’s Return.

Now here’s the thing; this isn’t based on any of L. Frank Baum’s many books that happen after The Wizard of Oz, it instead uses some out of canon story by his great Grandson Roger Stanton Baum. Now I can’t say if that book is good but I do notice that no one talks about many of the sequels that aren’t considered canon and I don’t think many people will be talking about the movie either. This movie is a mess and to be honest a lot of CG films this year just haven’t been that good but this might be the worst one I’ve seen all year. This film is completely forgettable and really uninteresting to look at with some of the flattest 3D to be done in the cinema all year.

The story of the film is that in Oz time a few years have passed and Oz has fallen prey to a new threat called the Jester, who is using the Wicked Witch of the West's broomstick and a magical Orb to terrorize all of Oz.  The Jester also captures all the leaders of Oz and turned them in marionettes. The Scarecrow, along with his friends the Tin Man and the Courageous Lion, find a way to contact and bring Dorothy back to Oz. For Dorothy the entire original adventure in Oz just happened a day a go but once she returns to Oz she has to complete another journey and make a new trio of friends to defeat this new magical bad guy.

Basically this whole story retreads the same type of journey seen in the classic 'Oz'. This time she meets a big, really brainy Owl named Wiser who really has no confidence. Then a solider of Candy County called Marshal Mallow who doesn’t know how to think for himself, and she meets the China Doll Princess, who must learn to not be so demanding and mean, a tired old princess trope seen many times before. Then the last person they encounter is an old talking tree who they turn into a boat called Tugg. The whole movie is 88 minutes of what feels like either a direct to DVD release bumped up to prime-time or three half an hour cartoons poorly tied together. Half the movie is singing with songs that really don’t help or move the plot along at all. There are points where you start to get into the story just a little bit before some annoying song starts blaring out of the speakers leaving you asking why and what’s happening. The vocal performances are decent with the singing all done very well since it’s by Broadway performers and people from Glee and Smash.

To what I said earlier the design of the movie is completely uninteresting. Most of the character designs are pretty generic or coming from old CG movies. Most of the lighting is very flat and the texture at time really didn’t bring any depth or sense of believability to the world or characters. It felt like watching in game cut scenes from launch era GameCube games. There was one short scene that the crew did a fantastic job and it’s where Marshal Mallow gets tricked into asking the China Doll Princess to marry him and even though it’s short it’s the only time I sat there and was like wow these folks did a bang up job making this. The 3D is also a waste if makes a lot of the film very blurry and darker than normal for 3D movies and again nothing really pops out. I took off my glasses a bunch of times while watching and it and I lost nothing. The 3D actually makes Wiser look the worst since his edges of his feathered body is always blurry.

So as you can see I’m not too fond of this movie at all. I don’t think you should waste your time with this unless you have a kid so into the Wizard of Oz that they will annoy you until you past out. This is something to me that so bad you shouldn’t even waste a red box on. With all the options out there just go watch the old movie or read them the book or even the comic adaptations. In the end when I walked out I felt like I just watched a failed Broadway musical that got turned into a failed animated movie that no one else should have to suffer through. 

Read More